Creating a Ripple

Racking my brain…

My family is at the stage now,

of counting my sweet mother’s breaths…

But I live so far away I could be in mars. At least it feels like it!

I want to be with her for all the last breaths and hold her hand.

She has given me so much, I don’t want her to go.

My mother turns 89 the beginning of Oct.

I want to celebrate her life while she is still with us.

HOW?

Then, I received an angel whisper.

An idea…create a ripple.

Every day for the month of September

leading up to her birthday on Oct. 1st

I am sending

all of her posterity

and brothers and sisters

a Fun Fact about her.

There are over 100 of us.

Everyone has LOVED it! 

Including my mother!

It allows me to do something for her

here on Mars.

It has allowed everyone to know facts about her

they never knew or remember back.

It has created a beautiful ripple

of her life which not only

encircles around her

but

encircles out

to all of us.

Here is a peek:

Grandma trusts all people!

At Ruth and Wade’s wedding reception Ruth told all of Wade’s friends where they were going to spend their wedding night, up in a little cabin in the canyons. That was a mistake! It was common in those days for friends to do a sneak attack on the new couple and knock on windows and yell silly comments. But Wade must have had a good friend who tipped him off. Wade got the last laugh when instead of going to the little cabin, he quickly changed the plans and went to his brother, Keith’s apartment. All his friends went to the canyons…but they weren’t there. Ruth wondered why they didn’t go to the canyons like they planned…

You can still have fun at the end of life….

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Tears over Silver Fillings

My father was a dentist.

His office was very much an extension of our home.

His toy box sits in my entry hall; with the same lid that falls and hits your head when you peek for a prize so you have to hold it up with one hand.

My dad was the most gentle dentist I have ever known. (And with four brothers and 6 next generation in the dental field, I know a lot of dentists!)

Once he gave himself a shot right in the front of his mouth with the needle straight up towards your nostril, just so he could empathize with patients getting one there…

Empathy and compassion was something he did quietly…

His patients loved him.

My dentist is not any of my relatives. I live too far away. It is difficult for me to sit in his chair and not look into drawers, pull out the mirror and hide instruments… just for fun…

My dentist wants to take out all of my amalgam (silver) fillings so my teeth will look “pretty.” There is no need; he just wants to purchase another car. He has walked out of my exams in a huff just because I won’t agree to change out those “unsightly” silver fillings.

They are my dad’s!

Years earlier I sat during different stages in my life with that green napkin around my neck while my dad drilled out black holes invading my teeth and gently replaced the decay with silver. That was the very best offered in the day. He hated to anesthetize me (shot) but he knew one pinch was easier than the other alternative.  I remember sitting in “the” chair looking up into his glasses as he focused on my teeth. He looked so serious as I stared up into his face trusting him completely.

He would sit back to pick up an instrument and sometimes squirt the assistant just for fun.

I told my dentist I didn’t want to change any of my silver fillings EVER! They were from my dad and they work just fine. He hates it when I say that.

Yesterday I was forced to change a silver filling because I chipped it. My dentist held up the mirror at the end and gloated, “See how much nicer that looks!”

Yep, it was white alright!

I cried on my way home from the dentist because a piece of my dad that was right there in my mouth that morning was just erased.

 I hate going to the dentist now.

The Loudest Clapper!

At 11 p.m. the other night my son and his friend spontaneously began jamming in the basement, choosing a violin and a guitar to rock with. The sound was super cool!

I stood near the closed door in the dark hallway of the kitchen and just listened. 

As they finished, I pulled opened the door, and  I clapped while it echoed in the stairwell.

In their surprise they laughed through the wall that separated me from them, then thanked me for being a loyal audience. I called down good-night, and the door made that distinct creek when I closed it while they went back to jamming.

I smiled when I crawled into bed still listening to the rock music two floors below.

It calmed me exactly like a lullaby!

How many spontaneous, off-the-fly moments have I captured just like this one?

So many!

These are my treasures!

Today

my last child of five

graduates from high school.

As I wrote in my journal this morning, I watched from my window, my neighbors walking their five year old boy to the bus stop of his last day of kindergarten. He was running ahead and his daddy had the backpack swung on his shoulder, scurrying to make the bus. With big bushes in my view, I could hear the screech of the bus wheels and then the push of the gas pedal as it drove away.

A flood of memories filled my mind of so many moments with five children on the last day of school.

So many years worth.

So many unplanned, spontaneous moments.

And so many clapping times.

Today when my son’s name is called to pick up his diploma,

I will be his loudest clapper.

I have been all along!

This day is a monumental last for our family

but it will not be my last clapping day.

I can’t wait to crawl in bed smiling, on many occasions to come.

You will change the world, my boy!

And I will always be clapping for you.

Today may be closing a chapter in our lives, but being a mom awards me the gift to always be the loudest, strongest and proudest clapper for all my children for the rest of their lives.

This makes me excited for what is on the horizon ahead!

I would like to share my most favorite poem on this special occasion in honor of this day to my husband and children:

Bits and Pieces

     l

There is

never

one grand

day

on which

you will do 

all the

glorious

things

you have

dreamed of

for a 

lifetime

through!

   ll

But rather

we

grab 

and

snatch,

gathering

happy

moments

like a

patchwork

quilt–

in

bits

and 

pieces:

A laugh

here,

a smile

there,

an embrace

with

kisses

and squeezes;

   lll

A hearty 

laugh

with a

friend,

the picnic

at a 

journey’s

end.

   lV

Happiness

is not

saved

for one

grand

day,

but only

in 

precious

and

unexpected

moments

along

the 

way!

Millie Foster Cheesman

Been Blowing Kisses

Been blowing kisses lately

HELLO DEAR SPRING
HELLO DEAR SPRING

Blowing to Daffy who is my very first beauty that finally is warm enough to open-

Blowing to my toooot-toot-toot, Lake Tahoe bird singing under my window-

Blowing to mini meadow and peek-a-boo path my old walking friends finally uncovered from snow-

Blowing to Lovely Lake, who literally last week melted her last patches of winter’s ice-

Other’s are blowing, too.

Today I watched a little boy walk the long path into school blowing kisses to a car stuck in school traffic. He blew and blew and blew with exuberance no matter who was watching. When the car passed I expected to see a woman (a mom) blowing back. But it was a man (a dad) and he was blowing back, his arm out the window, with gusto! 

Blow some kisses…

there is so much to love!

HOPE

One year ago today I walked a message in the snow to my mother who had stepped into heaven only a few short hours earlier. I felt bitterly cold to the core, silent, lonely, and empty…

Exactly one year later, in the exact spot, a new warmth emerged…

Angel watching over us
“Hello dear hearts.”

My parents are together!

Together again
“We are so happy!”

They are happy.

We are right here...
“We are always close to you, every single day…”

They are watching over me and my family.

Even when I peeked out the window at midnight

and could still see them waving, watching, and smiling,

I couldn’t help but hold on to–that hope!

It made me smile.

It made me feel connected to them.

I guess angels DO come in all shapes and sizes.

I miss them.

But that is because they taught me about LOVE.

How can I?

HOME
HOME

This is my childhood home.

Tomorrow is the very first time in my entire life that I am anxious to go there.

I have referred to it as “The Big Yellow House on the Corner since I was young. The name stuck with everyone and it has always been some shade of yellow.

This place has had the same phone number since the day it was built.

It is the very place my parents brought me when I was fresh from heaven to add to five others. I was the caboose.

There are probably a thousand tennis and baseballs hidden in that ivy which grows all the way around the corner over a white fence.

The wreathes on the door changed for every season. My mother loved flower arranging.

There are great places for hide and seek in this yard and we played nearly every summer night.

We climbed the fruit trees and ate cherries and apricots until we got sick. The lemon tree has huge thorns and the juice from the oranges are delicious!

That front door is where I had my first kiss…

But we never entered the house through that door. That was only for picking up the mail and the vacuum cleaner salesmen…and dates. Family and friends always entered at the side gate through the back yard. The gate where the dogs waited with their tails wagging and the cats slept on top of the fence.

That entry is near the driveway where I drove a stick for the first time in a white VW bug.

It is tradition to honk as you drive past this house. It sends an “I love you” signal and to remind all that I will be back soon.

The kitchen light over the stove is always left on for us.

I had my wedding reception in this garden.

And I brought each one of my babies here to be cuddled, adored and spoiled by two doting grandparents. So did my five older siblings and then later–our own children. My parent’s posterity has grown well over 100 now!

Over to the left is the place we buried our family dog of 16 years. He had epilepsy but such a dear heart.

The lower window was where we looked out as this group of 8 had family dinner’s together, we kept adding more and more family over the years. We laughed and ate and repeated eating there over and over again.

This was for sure the chimney Santa climbed down to leave presents at Christmas.

This was the entry where friends and family entered to say their last good-bye

to my father first,

and now recently my mother.

The house sits quiet now–

waiting.

 

Tomorrow I will fly six hours then enter the back door as I have my entire life.

The light on the stove will not be on.

There will no note from my mother welcoming me home, or a tiny rose or gardenia in a cup, or a sweet roll.

The house will be happy I have come home.

I now have to open closets and drawers and reveal the treasures my parents kept secretly hidden. I will reverently lift worn shoes and hug folded sweaters, knowing they won’t be worn any longer.

How do I face this?

How can I capture 55 years and put it in my pocket?

I want to break open the walls and pour the laughter and love inside my suitcase so I don’t have to leave it behind.

If I could I would reach around the entire house and embrace it and say thank-you over and over.

How will I be able to drive away in a few weeks and leave it–

forever?

I am not ready.

But it is time.

My parents will be there to help, I know it.

What blessings they brought to our lives.

I have so much to hold in my heart.

I love you my Big Yellow House on the Corner!

My HOME forever.

 

Blogcation until Sept.