Story 5: What I really really really want for Christmas

I do know what I want someone to give me for Christmas. I’ve known since I was forty years old. Wind-up mechanical toys that make noises and go round and round and do funny things. No batteries. Toys that need me to help them out from time to time. The old-fashioned painted tin ones I had as a child. That’s what I want, I tell you.

Well, okay, that’s close, but not quite exactly it. It’s delight and simplicity that’s I want. Foolishness and fantasy and noise.  Angels and miracles and wonder and innocence and magic. That’s closer to what I want.

It’s harder to talk about, but what I really, really, really, want for Christmas is just this:

I want to be five years old again for an hour.

I want to laugh a lot and cry a lot

I want to be picked up and rocked to sleep in someone’s arms, and carried up to bed just one more time.

I know what I really want for Christmas.

I want my childhood back.

Nobody is going to give me that. I might give at least the memory of it to myself if I try. I know it doesn’t make any sense, but when does Christmas make any sense, anyway? It is about a child, of long ago and far away, and it is about the child of now. In you and me.  Waiting behind the door of our hearts for something wonderful to happen.  A child who is impractical, unrealistic, simpleminded, and terribly vulnerable to joy. A child who does not need or want or understand gifts of socks or potholders.

Robert Fulghum

All I Really Need to Know I learned in Kindergarten


An advent worth keeping to…

Together lets light the world

Happy December 1st world!

We need a little Christmas…


Cancer’s score card added another tally. I am angry at Cancer. I hate it’s thievery with a vengeance!

I feel frightened as it steals yet

another innocent life.

I am sad.

Christmas time can be hectic and bothersome or

it can be quiet, soothing, and precious.

My friend’s life deserves the honor of the latter as I reflect on her goodness.

Today I play carols on low so I have to make an effort to really listen.

Today I wrap gifts slowly and think with gratitude about the person I am giving to, and smile that they are in my life.

Today I will bake and fill my home with soothing aromas of the season then eat comfort food and savor the taste.

Today I will hug my pillows before I fluff making the beds.

Today I will sit and look at my Christmas tree without any noise.

Today I will feed my forest family and take a walk no matter how frosty I feel, and smell the air, and thank God for the beauty of the earth right in front of my eyes.

Today I will listen to the dryer sound, sweep the floors and fold the socks and feel life in my home in the messes.

Tonight I will tuck my children in bed and lie awake and listen to their breathing.

Today I will place trust in my God who is in charge.

Today I will Believe

and hold tightly to Christmas…

in all its goodness and peace.

I hope I was there in the crowd…

Artist: Brian Kershisnik
Artist: Brian Kershisnik

I love this Christmas painting.

I can smell, here, and feel the scene.

It is closest to my Christmas vision.

I love Mary propped up after birth, absolutely spent, relieved it is over.

I love Joseph’s emotion.

I love to think there were women there to help.

I love the touch between Mary and Joseph.

I love Mary’s bare feet.

I love baby Jesus’ nuzzling and content.

I love the angels…

every single one!

I hope I was there in the crowd.

Merry Christmas to all.

Jesus Christ is our gift!