Scars

Have you ever accidentally slipped and cut your finger with a knife?

In that instant you know as the pain socks a punch, the blood begins to leak, and the shivers begin as you rush to cover and pinch.

But at Halloween, adding a jagged scar left over from a gruesome cut, perhaps with stitch marks achieves a great chilling affect to our costumes, decorations or pumpkin carvings that perhaps directly connect us to our own senses. We remember our own fear and pain. Scars are ugly and creepy…

But when Halloween is over some of us cannot remove those creepy imperfections by using soap and water; they are permanently a part of us and the true horror could be a mirror or the nightmarish memories. 

But not for a brave teenage Nigerian girl

who looks at scars with a powerful perspective…

“…I ask you right here to please to agree with me that a scar is never ugly. That is what the scar makers want us to think. But you and I we must make an agreement to defy them. We must see all scars as beauty, okay? This will be our secret. Because take it from me, a scar does not form on the dying. A scar means, I survived.

(Little Bee by Chris Cleave, page 9)

God bless my sisters and brothers in cancer who are beautiful with scars.

Never forget, no one can cut your spirit!

Celebrating Cancer Awareness Month

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The need to scream!

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I encourage healthy screaming.

Life gets weird, lonely, frightening, hopeless, frustrating, unfair, and so out of whack that sometimes we need to scream because we want someone to hear us. 

But isn’t screaming a little extreme and impolite, you say?

That depends…

If you do not have some type of outlet for things out of your control then it becomes extremely dangerous for your inside self. Most people who have experienced cancer in their lives usually have kept screams inside…

I have been analyzing from my own life and the lives of other people ways we can healthy “scream,” often without straining our vocal chords. Healthy screams are statements we make or actions we do which make a very LOUD statement about something we need to say or to just “let off steam.”

Many people scream out in different ways such as running, competing in or participating in all different types of sports, yoga, meditation, breathing, attending concerts, gardening, driving a car, playing music, dancing, creating something, dressing a certain way, dying their hair, shopping,…etc. 

Regardless of how, if you need to scream choose a healthy safe way. Then let it go!

“Sometimes you just gotta yell and scream. Sometimes it’s the only thing to do. Noisy as a firetruck, you just gotta open up and get the crowds attention turned to you…” (Safety Kids Music)

 

 

the tones of life

I never realized what a treasure this one little gift has been from my childhood home after my parents passed away. It sings a familiar tune as the metal tubes sway and tap merrily in the breeze. It lifts me up and takes me to a gentle time and place.

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This thought expresses the blessed tone of my parents’ life music they sang to us.

Let our words be like wind chimes.

Tone is something we hear like wind chimes blowing in the air. What sounds do our words make…? Communication is more than what we say; it is how we say it and how we sound. As much as possible, without forfeiting what we have to say, let our words be music to people’s ears.

Melody Beattie

 

Creating a Ripple

Racking my brain…

My family is at the stage now,

of counting my sweet mother’s breaths…

But I live so far away I could be in mars. At least it feels like it!

I want to be with her for all the last breaths and hold her hand.

She has given me so much, I don’t want her to go.

My mother turns 89 the beginning of Oct.

I want to celebrate her life while she is still with us.

HOW?

Then, I received an angel whisper.

An idea…create a ripple.

Every day for the month of September

leading up to her birthday on Oct. 1st

I am sending

all of her posterity

and brothers and sisters

a Fun Fact about her.

There are over 100 of us.

Everyone has LOVED it! 

Including my mother!

It allows me to do something for her

here on Mars.

It has allowed everyone to know facts about her

they never knew or remember back.

It has created a beautiful ripple

of her life which not only

encircles around her

but

encircles out

to all of us.

Here is a peek:

Grandma trusts all people!

At Ruth and Wade’s wedding reception Ruth told all of Wade’s friends where they were going to spend their wedding night, up in a little cabin in the canyons. That was a mistake! It was common in those days for friends to do a sneak attack on the new couple and knock on windows and yell silly comments. But Wade must have had a good friend who tipped him off. Wade got the last laugh when instead of going to the little cabin, he quickly changed the plans and went to his brother, Keith’s apartment. All his friends went to the canyons…but they weren’t there. Ruth wondered why they didn’t go to the canyons like they planned…

You can still have fun at the end of life….

Come on over…

My dear friends and followers,

I am taking this full virtual-space (Cancer Together; What do I do now?) and add it to my other blog-bowl;

 Have Fun With It

to create a big messy gooey life recipe.

I offer you a spoon and hope you will dip in and take some tastes.

I am excited to also introduce to you a new blog on my passion; Preserving that mysterious and wonderful time called “childhood.” Please take a peek and send others.

 Only One Childhood

This space will stay open offering my hand and heart as a continuous life preserver holding to you as you return back to posts.

You will

find those pieces of HAPPY 

you feel you have lost

buried

under the

cancer brick load.

I understand and acknowledge YOU.

Thank you for allowing me

to hold on to you

as my life saver.

I hope you will continue on my journey and enjoy…

Have Fun With It

One little Marguerite

If you would ask me what my favorite flower is

it would be a white Marguerite daisy.

Daisy

I have never told this story to anyone before.

It was in a High School art class.

You know the elective that all your friends sign up for to have a social period.  We were to bring in a real flower as part of a project. I forgot until the day it was due so ripped a white flower from off of a bush in our backyard and brought it to school wrapped in a wet paper towel.

For the assignment we were to fold a 12 by 18 in. white construction paper in half then over to the side to open into four rectangles. We were to draw our flower in each rectangle realistically, in abstraction, in cubism, and in a unique view point.

The teacher insisted that we sit for 15 minutes and study our flower and if we goofed off we would receive detention. And then she set the white egg timer clicking the time and sat down. There were a few snide comments and some giggles but soon a hush fell over the classroom.

Have you ever taken 15 minutes and stared at one flower?

 It is a long time…

At first you look at it and your mind takes a picture and you think, okay I saw it…

And then you move in to take a closer look. It was a white Marguerite daisy, I found out later. It did not have five loopy bright colored petals with a bright yellow circle center that most of us doodle on paper and gets made into a giant sticker to stick on the rear of Volkswagen Beatles. 

Every single petal narrows to the end that attaches strong into the center then tapers out to a curve which cups just a tiny bit at the end.

Each petal has hills and valley ridges that stripe the petal which change the white to different shades.

When the petals stretch out they overlap because it is crowded.

The petals feel like silky fuzzy paper.

The inside has hundreds of little curly balls clustered together and grab to a center orb.

They appear yellow but when you look closely they are a variety of golden earth tones which also change in the light.

The flower has a green stem made of long strands of vein like fibers and at the jagged end, where it was ripped from its life source, is an opaque white center that drips fluid.

At the top underneath the white petal umbrella is a star shape cup made out of green leaves with points at the tips. This cup tucks the entire flower perfectly inside to hold it upright.

The timer went ding. The chatter resumed. The class bell eventually rang and we left. I completed the assignment in a few weeks.  I loved that picture.

I grew up with a mother who spoke to flowers and a father who spoke to animals. They did not only model reverence for earth’s gifts but to be enamored by them. 

But 15 minutes with a Marguerite daisy converted me.

I believe I finally saw God as an artist

and I have been in complete admiration ever since.

The night when everyone slept

Have you felt

alone

anger

pain

loss

desperate

defeated

deserving

nauseated

manipulated

humiliated

clumsy

stupid

judged

embarrassed

abandoned

betrayed

starved

denied

rejected

sad

sick

broken

cut

taken from

not good enough

doubtful

uneasy

stuck

deceived

destroyed

beaten

banished

burned

bitter

repentant

alone

sorrowful

 doom

despair

encumbered

tired

hurt

afflicted

undeserved

untrusted

uncomforted

terror

shock

hopeless

misunderstood

put down

not heard

diseased

darkness

misery

fallen

failure

stripped

unappreciated

disappointed

sorrow

mad

frustration

scornful

shunned

unloved

forgotten

harm

lost

imprisoned

empty

weary

oppressed

dirty

bad

unworthy

frightened

wounded

silent

like crying…

“Yes”

Jesus felt

      everything…

mid-

night,

next to

knotted roots

of

gnarled

olive trees

while

an angel

held Him,

and

cried too.

 

I am NEVER alone!